#1: We all have to participate? Bring it on, bitch.

#2: This is why Osama hates us.

#3: This is what makes kids bring guns to school.

#4: The junior class song needs to be "Come to Daddy (Philip remix)".

Song of the Random Time Interval: "Rent," Rent.
Item of the Random Time Interval: The clutch
Words of the Random Time Interval: "That coffee table knows more about Russian history than she did."