Information Research Weblog

Vice-President Cheney to Visit Church this Weekend. Bulletproof Vests Half Off in Gift Shop.

Now is also a good time to go ahead and install that armor plating, originally earmarked for our troops in Iraq, that many of you picked up for your Hummers from entrepreneurial government contractors on eBay last year. Furthermore, we are asking that everyone planning to attend the service and subsequent "Hillary Effigy Shooting, Dismembering and Mauling Morning Hootenanny Extravaganza" with the vice-president now submit a "Waiver of Liability for Death or Injury Resulting from Gross Negligence or Drunken Anger" form in triplicate before you will be allowed to participate in these joyous events.